Change is rarely simple. Even the changes we know are good- like leaving a job that no longer fits, ending a relationship that isn’t right, moving into a home we’ve dreamed of - can carry a surprising weight. You might feel relief, excitement, or hope for the future, and at the same time notice an undercurrent of sadness, nostalgia, or even guilt. You might catch yourself thinking, “Why am I crying if this is supposed to be a positive change?” If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone, and it’s not a sign that something is wrong with you. In my work as a psychotherapist, I see many people navigating this paradox: the mix of joy and grief that comes when life shifts in a way that’s ultimately healthy, but also unfamiliar. Recognizing and understanding these emotions is not only normal, but it’s an essential part of integrating change in a meaningful way. The Paradox of Grief in Positive Change Grief doesn’t only happen after death. Every time we step away from what was familiar, there is a part of ourselves, a chapter of our life, or a vision of the future that we mourn. Divorce is one of the clearest examples: ending a marriage might be the healthiest decision for both partners, but it also brings a very real sense of loss. You may feel relief, freedom, or hope for the life ahead, and yet find yourself missing shared routines, special memories, or the “what could have been.” This paradox exists in so many life changes: starting a new job, moving to a city you’ve always wanted to live in, sending a child off to school or university. On paper, everything seems like progress, and yet inside, your mind and body register that something familiar has ended. That sadness, nostalgia, or uncertainty doesn’t mean you’ve made the wrong choice- it means you are human, adapting to a new reality while honoring the past. Why Feeling Both Relief and Grief Makes Sense When we take a closer look at the brain and body, it makes sense that even positive change feels emotionally intense. New routines, responsibilities, and environments activate the stress response, even when we consciously want the change. Hormonal shifts, disrupted sleep, and the body’s natural response to uncertainty can all amplify emotion. Psychologically, you may be negotiating two competing truths: I am moving forward, and I am leaving something meaningful behind. Holding these truths at once can feel confusing, even destabilizing, but it is a sign that your nervous system is attuned, sensitive, and responsive to the significance of your life. Think of grief as a bridge. It connects who you were, what you valued, and the life you leave behind with who you are becoming. Feeling sadness alongside excitement doesn’t erase progress. It enriches it. It allows you to step forward more fully, carrying your past with awareness instead of avoidance. How to Hold Complexity With Compassion When clients come to me experiencing [...]

When ADHD Doesn’t Look Like the Stereotype For decades, the cultural image of ADHD has looked like the energetic young boy who can’t stay in his seat. Loud, impulsive, disruptive. But what happens when the person with ADHD is a high-performing adult woman who seems perfectly put together on the outside, yet feels chronically overwhelmed inside? In my work as a psychotherapist, I often meet women who have quietly battled exhaustion, perfectionism, and self-doubt for years. Many were never flagged in childhood because their ADHD looked different from the stereotype. While boys often display outward hyperactivity, girls and women are more likely to experience inattentive symptoms like daydreaming, mental “clutter,” or difficulty sustaining focus- easy to overlook when masked by good grades or relentless effort. How Biology and Life Stages Play a Role Hormones add another layer of complexity to ADHD, and understanding this connection can be eye-opening for many women. Estrogen, in particular, plays a significant role in regulating dopamine- the neurotransmitter that helps us stay motivated, focused, and able to filter distractions. When estrogen levels rise, dopamine activity typically improves, and many women notice that concentrating feels easier. When estrogen drops, dopamine dips as well, and ADHD symptoms can become noticeably stronger. This ebb and flow shows up throughout a woman’s life. During the menstrual cycle, for example, estrogen is highest in the first half (the follicular phase) and drops sharply in the days leading up to a period. Many of my clients report that the week before their period feels like wading through fog: tasks that were manageable a few days ago suddenly feel overwhelming, and emotional regulation takes extra effort. Pregnancy often brings its own surprises. For some, the naturally higher estrogen levels during pregnancy can create a temporary sense of focus and calm. For others, the fatigue and changes in sleep, combined with ADHD, can make organization feel impossible. Postpartum, when hormones shift dramatically, symptoms can rebound or intensify, sometimes alongside mood changes like postpartum depression or anxiety. Perimenopause and menopause can also be particularly challenging. As estrogen gradually declines, many women experience a noticeable uptick in ADHD traits- things like forgetfulness, distractibility, difficulty finding words- sometimes for the first time in years. These changes can coincide with major life transitions, such as career shifts or caring for aging parents, creating a perfect storm of stress. Recognizing the biological rhythm behind these experiences is empowering. Instead of wondering “What’s wrong with me this week?” you can see the pattern and plan around it. Some women track their cycle to anticipate more distractible days, adjusting their workload or adding extra reminders. Others find that therapy, lifestyle changes, or medical support can help buffer these hormonal swings. Our biology isn’t something to fight against; it’s information. When we understand how our brains and bodies move through each life stage, we can build strategies that honour those natural rhythms and give ourselves the compassion we deserve. The Professional Camouflage By the time they [...]

Being a new parent can be a wonderful experience, but there are aspects of new parenthood that are not always discussed. Here are some “survival” tips for adjusting to parenthood. Build a support team around you: Not everyone can play “the goalie” on a hockey team, so when it comes to support, we need to consider the people in our lives and what position on the team they can fulfill. Positions to consider include social, emotional, informational, and practical. Accept help: Let others assist with meals, cleaning, or errands—this isn’t a sign of weakness but a way to conserve energy and stay healthy. Set boundaries with family and friends: It’s okay to say no to visits or advice that feels overwhelming or intrusive. Protect your space and time.  Focus on self-care that is realistic: Small actions like taking a shower, eating a nutritious snack, or resting when baby naps can make a big difference.  Don’t compare yourself to other parents: Every parent’s journey is unique. What works for others may not work for you—and that’s okay.  Don’t compare your baby to other babies: Developmental timelines vary. Focus on your baby’s individual progress and needs.  Limit social media: Seeing curated “perfect” parenthood online can lead to unnecessary pressure or self-doubt.  It’s ok to not be perfect: It’s normal to be “figuring” things out as you go. Mistakes are part of learning and growing as a parent.  Watch your internal dialogue: Positive affirmations can be used to remind yourself that you can do this and that you are doing a good job.  Share your pregnancy and birth experience with your partner: This helps with mood and communication, which reduces stress and builds emotional connection.  As baby gets older, consider joining baby groups: This provides social interaction, emotional support, and shared experiences with others in similar situations.  Seek out support from your family doctor, OB, or therapist if you are struggling: Professional support can help address postpartum depression, anxiety, or other mental health concerns early on. Supporting New Parents Do you know someone who is a new parent? Telling a new set of parents to reach out if they need help may not be enough support, as many parents won’t ask for help when needed (they may not want to “burden” their family and friends). Here are some suggestions to effectively support a new set of parents. Reassure them that they are doing a good job: New parents often doubt themselves, so kind words can go a long way in boosting confidence.  Check in regularly: A simple message or call can remind them that they’re not alone and that someone cares.  Offer to help but be specific about what help you are offering: For example, “I’m going to bring you dinner tomorrow night,” or “Can I watch the baby while you nap?”  Respect their boundaries: Understand that their time, energy, and space may be limited—and be mindful not to take offense.  Listen to what the new mom and [...]

Being diagnosed with Crohn’s disease was unexpected. Like many others who receive this kind of news, I didn’t see it coming—and when it hit, it brought a wave of emotions that were hard to sort through. One feeling that stood out most was grief. This was amplified even more, given that one of my children was diagnosed with the same disease six months prior to my diagnosis. Can you experience grief without death or loss? It may sound strange at first. Grief is usually associated with loss—the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, a major life change. But chronic illness comes with its own kind of loss. Crohn’s, like other inflammatory bowel diseases (IBD), doesn’t just affect the digestive/immune systems. It affects your whole life: your plans, your energy, your relationships, your sense of identity. Suddenly, things most people take for granted become major considerations. Spontaneous outings, travel, eating out, or even just going to work can require careful planning, if they’re possible at all. There’s also the invisible nature of it. People don’t always see the pain, the fatigue, the mental toll. Because of that, it can be isolating. You can look fine on the outside while struggling deeply on the inside; both physically and emotionally. With this particular disease there are other parts of the body that struggle too; the liver, eyes, joints and other systems are also impacted during a flare up. Many of the medications used to treat these diseases also come with a range of significant side effects. The new “normal”: It’s been just over a month since my diagnosis, and I’m still learning, adapting, and trying to navigate this new reality. Every day has been a challenge. I’m currently exploring different treatment options and medications in the hope of managing the disease and eventually reaching remission. Some days, I feel embarrassed and overwhelmed by how much my life has changed. I know my son struggles with similar feelings and we often feel like we are a burden, or that life revolves around our illness and inhibits our family from enjoying their lives to the fullest. Mental Health and Chronic Illness: This experience has taken a serious toll on both my mental health and my child’s. We’re trying to cope with grief, anxiety, and low mood. If you're going through something similar, please know: you are not alone. Grieving the version of life you imagined is valid. But over time the hope is that we learn to live with our new reality. We will learn what our body needs and we will find a strength we didn’t know we had. Life with Crohn’s (or any chronic disease) is not linear. There are good days and hard ones. There are flares and remissions. But with support, self-compassion, and the right care, it is possible to build a meaningful life around your diagnosis—not in spite of it, but alongside it. While chronic illness might change your life, it [...]

As the back-to-school season quickly approaches, many families are feeling the shift from summer freedom to school-year structure. Starting a new routine can be challenging not just for kids, but for parents too. The good news? With a little planning (and a lot of teamwork), families can make this transition smoother, more fun, and even a little creative. Here’s how to work with your child to build a routine that works and sticks. Start With a Brainstorming Session: Sit down with your child and start brainstorming together. Ask: What are the things that need to happen every day before and after school? What does a smooth morning look like? What’s part of a good bedtime routine? Write everything down, no idea is too small at this stage. Treat it like a rough draft where both of you can contribute thoughts. The goal is to encourage participation and make your child feel like an active part of the process. Encourage Their Input: Let your child share their ideas. What do they think is important in their routine? What do they feel works well or doesn’t? Talk through their suggestions and share your perspective as well. This is a great opportunity to model problem-solving, compromise, and planning. Remember: when kids help create the plan, they’re much more likely to follow it. Create a Visual Routine That Fits Your Family: Now it’s time to bring that rough draft to life in a format that works best for your household. Here are a few creative options: Poster Board Schedule: Use markers, stickers, and drawings to create a big, visual schedule you can hang in your child’s bedroom or a common space. Digital Design: Use tools like Canva, Word, or Google Docs to create a sleek, printable version. Checklist Style: Some kids thrive with a simple, daily checklist they can mark off themselves. The goal is clarity. Your routine should be easy to understand, visible, and realistic for your child’s age and ability. Boost Motivation With a Reward System (Optional): Many families find that a simple reward system can go a long way in building momentum and encouraging consistency. Here’s one idea: Give your child a point for each completed task (or for successfully completing the full routine). Once they collect a certain number of points, they can earn a reward. Rewards can be simple and meaningful: Extra screen time Choosing what’s for dinner A small toy or book A trip to the park or local store Whatever you choose, make sure the rules are clear from the beginning and that the rewards are sustainable for your family’s lifestyle. Final Thoughts: Progress Over Perfection: Building new routines takes time, patience, and flexibility. Some days will go smoothly, others might not. That’s okay. The goal isn’t perfection, it’s progress. By involving your child in the process, you're not just setting them up for school-year success; you’re also helping them build independence, confidence, and responsibility. So grab some paper, sit down together, [...]

I have debated writing this blog for years. Growing up in a family with a parent that was a first responder I understand how the job can impact the family and the first responder themselves. I was always proud of my parent and their role, but aware of the struggles that came with the role, even more so as I became an adult and raised my own family. First responders; police officers, firefighters, paramedics, corrections and probation staff, emergency medical staff and mental health professionals, are the backbone of each community’s safety. But what about their families? Often, the emotional toll of their role is felt deeply at home, and the mental health struggles faced by first responder families rarely receive the support and resources they need and deserve. It’s no secret that first responders experience high-stress situations daily in their field. Dealing with trauma, life-and-death decisions, and sometimes horrific scenes is all part of their job. In particular in our community we have seen the impact of the opioid epidemic and the volume of calls our first responders are responding to in order to provide support to our most vulnerable community members. While many will say they are trained to cope with these stressors, there is often a lot more that could be done to prepare and support first responders for the realities of their job. The emotional fall out and stress experienced for the family can also be incredibly difficult to understand and navigate. The impact on families: Emotional Isolation – Spouses and children may feel isolated, not fully understanding the mental toll their loved one’s job takes on them. First responders may shield their families from the details of their work, creating an unintentional barrier that can leave family members feeling disconnected and unsure of how best to support their loved one.. Secondary Trauma – Hearing about traumatic events can be emotionally draining, even if you weren’t there. For spouses and children who listen to their loved ones recount difficult calls, this secondary trauma can lead to anxiety, depression, and PTSD-like symptoms. Unpredictability and Fear – With long, erratic hours and the fear that their loved one may not return home, anxiety can be very present for these families. Often first responder parents will miss out on important family events; vacations, school events, birthdays etc which can feel very unpredictable for the family and can be hard to explain to small children. The spouse may understand the need for them to do their job, but it can also be lonely for them as they navigate parenting and life when the job needs them. Increased Risk of Substance Abuse – Unfortunately, some first responders use substances to manage their own stress, and this behavior can spill over into the home. In particular for first responders who are from an older generation, drinking and smoking were often encouraged after a particularly difficult shift or call, thus creating unhealthy coping mechanisms that impact them and [...]

As millennials, we’ve grown up in an era where news is constantly at our fingertips. Whether it’s scrolling through social media, watching the latest headlines on TV, or getting notifications from news apps, it feels like the world is always in a state of flux. While staying informed can be viewed as important, the constant barrage of information can take a toll on our mental health, particularly when anxiety is involved. So, what’s the connection between anxiety and the news? And more importantly, how can we navigate the never-ending stream of updates without letting it affect our mental well-being? The Relationship Between Anxiety and the News It's no secret that bad news sells. From the rise of natural disasters to political turmoil and social unrest, it’s easy to find yourself caught in a loop of negative headlines. While it’s important to stay aware of what's happening in the world, all this negativity can create a sense of dread. For those of us who are prone to anxiety, this sense of constant worry can escalate, leading to heightened stress, fear, and even panic. Here are a few ways the news cycle feeds into anxiety: Information Overload: With news constantly being pushed to our phones and devices, it can be hard to take a step back. This constant flow of information can feel overwhelming, especially when it’s all happening at once. The 24/7 News Cycle: The world doesn’t stop, and neither do the headlines. This continuous stream of news, often sensationalized for clicks, can leave us feeling like we can never truly escape. Fear of Missing Out: When we’re exposed to distressing stories, it’s hard not to feel like we have to keep up with every single update. This urgency can increase our anxiety, especially if we don’t feel like we’re in control of the situation. Empathy Overload: As millennials, we tend to be deeply empathetic, which makes us highly sensitive to the suffering of others. While this is a beautiful trait, it can also leave us emotionally drained when we’re constantly confronted with tragedy. Practical Tips for Managing Anxiety While Staying Informed We know it’s impossible to avoid the news altogether, there are definitely ways to manage how it affects us. Here are a few strategies to help you maintain your mental well-being without completely tuning out the world. 1. Limit Your News Consumption It might seem counterintuitive, but giving yourself boundaries around news consumption can help reduce stress. Try to limit the time you spend checking news apps, social media, or watching TV. You can set specific times throughout the day to catch up with the headlines, and outside of those moments, allow yourself to disconnect. 2. Be Selective About Your Sources Not all news is created equal. Try to avoid sensationalized, fear-mongering headlines. Subscribing to well-rounded news outlets that offer balanced perspectives can help you stay informed without spiraling into anxiety. Consider following fact-checked, trusted publications or podcasts that take a measured, thoughtful approach [...]

Even though we are still enjoying summer and school feels like a long way away, some kids will begin to experience anxiety about new routines, academic pressure, or social situations. These feelings are common, especially after a long break or transitions like starting a new grade or school and can be amplified for children who already experience anxiety, depression or other mental/physical health concerns. Here are some helpful tips for kids dealing with back-to-school anxiety: Talk About It: Encourage kids to share their worries. Sometimes just talking about what's on their mind can relieve anxiety. Establish a Routine: Start adjusting bedtime, mealtimes, and morning routines a week or two before school begins. Predictability can ease stress. See our video from Registered Social Worker, Brianna Kerr about this: https://www.facebook.com/BrantMentalHealthSolutions/videos/1256912242777305  Visit the School if it's a new school: If possible, take a tour of the school, meet the teacher, or walk through the class schedule to build familiarity. Practice Coping Skills: Teach simple strategies like deep breathing, counting to ten, or using calming visuals to manage anxious feelings. Focus on the Positives: Talk about the fun parts of school—seeing friends, learning new things, or joining favorite activities. Limit Over-Scheduling: Make sure kids have downtime to relax and unwind, especially during the first few weeks of school. Be Supportive, Not Dismissive: Let them know it's okay to feel nervous, but remind them they’ve handled challenges before and can do it again. Involve a Mental Health Professional:  A mental health professional can provide valuable support by helping children identify and manage their emotions, develop healthy coping strategies, and build confidence through open conversations and age-appropriate techniques. With the right guidance, kids can feel more prepared and supported as they adjust to the school environment. For more information about how our team can support your child, call us at 519.302.2300 or email reception@brantmentalhealth.com, our dedicated admin staff will be happy to assist you and pair you with the right therapist for your unique situation.

Self-care has become a popular topic in recent years and we are often told we need to practice it for the benefit of our mental health. But what is it? It is the intentional way we take care of our physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental well-being. It is about taking care of ourselves so we are better able to manage everyday stresses. It is preemptively managing our overall health. Often we are told self-care includes bubble baths, yoga, meditation or taking care of our basic needs (i.e. getting enough sleep, drinking enough water, healthy eating, etc.). While these are all great examples, self-care is so much more than that and unique to each individual. What makes one individual feel at peace and well, may not for someone else. What is great about practicing self-care in one area of well-being, is that it often has an impact on the others as well. Below are some ideas to include in a self-care routine that can even be incorporated into a busy life: Physical: 5-15 minutes of direct sunlight - vitamin D has so many incredible benefits Go for a walk Pre-make a breakfast you look forward to having the next morning Have a treat Hygiene practices that make you feel good (skin care routine, hot shower/bath, spending extra time on yourself, trying a new look, brushing your teeth, etc.) Exercise that you look forward to and doesn’t feel like a chore Move your body in small ways (i.e. stretching during a Netflix binge) Emotional: Set and maintain boundaries - this sets the standards for how we want to be treated by others Seek connection: surround yourself with healthy relationships, engage in activities that interest you, regularly spend time with those who make you feel loved Take a pause: take a break from a task that is becoming too much, allow yourself down time and rest, use your vacation days for you Be aware of the media you consume: pay attention if you are feeling drained, stressed, heightened, or experience decreased mood after a show, movie, podcast, listening to particular music, or scrolling social media Mental: Unplug: take time to unplug from the tv, phone, computer etc. Constant intake of information is overwhelming for our brain and can also make us feel lethargic or foggy Set a timer for 15 minutes (or whatever time frame that feels right for you) and try to accomplish one task. Having a brain bogged down by an endless to-do list is exhausting. Doing something small can lessen the load and make us feel accomplished. Do more of what you love - hobbies, activities, visiting new or favourite places Get extra support when needed - ask family/friends for help, connect with a therapist, make that doctor’s appointment Try gratitude - shifting our focus on what we are grateful for, when possible, can shift our entire mindset and reduce negative thoughts Spiritual: Spend time in the places that bring you peace and connection - [...]

Many clients ask about what to do over the summer months with therapy sessions. The warm weather, beach days and vacations can certainly improve our mood, but it’s important to remember that consistency with your care helps to maintain progress you have made and can help prevent setbacks with your mental health. In this blog we break down some important points to consider for adults and children when it comes to their care over the summer months. For Adults Summer can feel easier but that’s not always true: Longer days and sunshine help, but stress, burnout, and emotional fatigue don’t disappear with warm weather. Mental health care isn’t just for crisis moments: It’s also about maintaining progress, routines, and emotional strength, just like physical fitness. Gaps in therapy can stall growth: Even a short pause can make it harder to return or undo some momentum that you have built up previously. Consider flexible care: Summer is a great time to switch to biweekly sessions, use online therapy, or check in monthly with intention. Self-care does not mean solo care: Vacations and beach days are refreshing, but they’re not a substitute for structured support if you're navigating anxiety, depression, or healing. For Kids & Teens:  Summer changes their routine, not their needs: Just because school’s out doesn’t mean emotions stop. In fact, summer can bring to surface some new anxieties as it relates to identity, friendships, transitions, or boredom. Boredom often drives teenagers to make drastic decisions during summer months. Proactively get them engaged in setting goals to work on for the summer. It’s a great time to go deeper: Without school stress, many kids are more open and present in sessions. Consistency builds safety: Therapy can be a constant, supportive anchor during a season with fewer rules. Tailor therapy to feel lighter: Some therapists offer more creative, play-based, or nature-integrated sessions in summer. This is perfect for younger clients. Include mental health in your summer wellness plan: Just like sunscreen and hydration, don’t forget emotional care this summer. Final Thoughts: Therapy doesn't always have to be intense, but it should stay intentional. Summer can be a time of growth, connection, and healing, not just a break. If you are interested in learning more about our team and how we can support you, or a loved one, give us a call at 519.302.2300 or email reception@brantmentalhealth.com