COVID Grief is a Real Thing: Here’s What You Need To Know
Our world has changed. What initially felt temporary is now beginning to feel more permanent. There is a collective grief being felt by many. Additionally, with feelings of an uncertain future, many are experiencing anticipatory grief which can take our mindsto the worst scenarios. Grieving an emotional loss, or a change in somethingfamiliar, is normal. We have been taught to distract ourselves from the emotions we do not wish to face. Burying or ignoring these emotions only delays our healing and leads to increased feelings of exhaustion, anxiety, and depression.Once we find the courage to confront whatwe have been avoiding, we can begin the healing process. The Grief Recovery Institute believes there are mythsmany of us reach for in an attemptto heal our emotional pain. We have been conditionedto believe our feelings do not matter and as a result many of us self-isolate and grieve alone. We have been taught to be strong for others and in an effort to feel better we replace our loss. We stay busy as we wait for time to heal our wounds. These coping strategies are called myths for a reason. Rather than heal our pain, these strategies keep us trapped in a never-ending cycle of grief. How do these myths relate to COVID and our current protocols? Grief can be the result of the death of a loved one. It may be the feelings which follow divorce. Grief may be things we wished had been different, unrealized dreams and expectations, or unsaid communications which need to be heard. Grief can be the conflicting feelings due to a change in something familiar. COVID has robbed us of our familiar - removed our feelings of safety and caused many of us to feela loss of control and personal autonomy. Couple all this with any previous unresolved emotions, and we find ourselves riding a never-ending rollercoaster of emotional uncertainty. Intellectual statements differ greatly from those which come from our heart. As humans we are programmed to want to be accepted, to fit in, and will do anything to achieve this. With so much misinformation, confusion, and division surrounding COVID we mayfind ourselves afraid to share our thoughts and feelings for fear of rejection. When we believe our feelings do not matter, we withdraw, shelter ourselves from the criticism, and wait for the storm to pass. Waiting for the pain to go away can increase our feelings of isolation and anxiety. Time is not a verb: it is a noun. To resolve any unfinished business,which resides within us, we are the ones who must act. Uncomfortable with the silence and isolation, many of us reach for short term energy relieving behaviours (STERBs) to distract us from our pain. During COVID, our distractions have become even easier to access. Alcohol and grocery stores remain open. Netflix provides endless hours of entertainment. Phones and computers offer numerous applications to occupy our time. STERBs do provide relief in the interim. However, once we [...]