Becoming a new mother can be extremely daunting. Whether you are having your first or fourth child, it is natural to experience a certain level of anxiety at the prospect of adding a child to your family. This is true in “normal” circumstances, but with social distancing and isolation and new hospital procedures due to the COVID-19 pandemic, bringing a child into the world has been made all the more challenging and emotionally draining. For many new moms (the lucky ones!) they have a support system in place. Often this support system begins by having someone attend some or all of their scheduled Obstetric appointments in the lead up to the birth. Then, in having someone by their side through the delivery or C-Section and then the family and friends that come to visit in the hospital as mom recovers. Once the family leaves the hospital, many new families will have friends and loved ones bringing over meals, helping to clean the home while mom recovers, entertaining other children in the house and generally giving mom a much-needed break! With COVID-19, many new moms (and dads) are experiencing drastic changes to the way they bring their baby into the world. Birthing partners are not being allowed into the Operating Room for C-Sections and family and friends are not able to come and visit in the hospital or at home. This will inevitably take its toll on new moms and dads. As someone who has had three C-Sections, I can’t imagine not being able to have my partner in the Operating Room with me. I know this would have been upsetting for my husband as well, to miss the moment our children were born. What is concerning is that, although this new hospital policies and procedures are necessary in our fight against COVID-19, they are setting many more mothers up to experience dramatic shifts in their mood and wellbeing, as they adapt to these changes and experience the potential loneliness of this new “normal.” What should you be looking for? Whether you are a new mom yourself, or you are the husband/partner, family member or friend of a new mom, here are some things you should know; In general, within the first 3-4 days of giving birth, it is natural and common for moms to experience what is referred to as the “baby blues.” The Baby Blues include things like; being weepy, feeling irritable, feeling overwhelmed, feeling tired and experiencing changes in appetite (eating too much or too little.) For many moms, the baby blues will lift within a few days as your hormones settle and you adapt to the changes of having a new child to care for. If these symptoms don’t shift, and seem to last for weeks or months, this may be an indication that you are experiencing Post-partum depression. If crying has become a regular part of moms day and they are feeling sad, confused, scared, or even feeling numb, this is a sign of Post-partum [...]

Those who work in law enforcement, EMS, fire, air medical, ER, etc. are all very familiar with the complexities of witnessing trauma on a daily basis.  These caring and hardworking first responders provide us with much-needed public safety and support.  Unfortunately, many of these individuals overlook their personal reactions or do not have the necessary tools to process and heal their own feelings of grief which results from their chosen careers. I can’t begin to imagine the rush of emotions which must flood first responders after an emergency call.  They often find themselves in horrible situations where loss is sudden and unexpected.  Without proper tools to work through the situations, they do what we all have been taught to do when grieving: suppress emotions; pretend to be strong for others; and wait for time to make everything feel better. For many, when time doesn’t ease the pain of suffering, the next strategy is to stay busy and replace the feelings of loss with something else.  While time may be filled with such things as alcohol, drugs, shopping, sex, or whatever distract us, or helps us hide, from the feelings we do not wish to face, the healing remains unsuccessful. Grief is the normal and natural reaction to an emotional loss of any kind and first responders have additional losses the general public may never encounter: the death of a patient; the inability to find an abducted child; watching the results of a disabling car accident; or being unable to extinguish a house fire while the residents remain inside.  Without a way to diffuse the emotional triggers, memories of these incidents can lead to nightmares and years of anxiety. Grief can also be the change in something which was familiar; Perhaps a work partner dies, there is a reassignment to another team, a promotion is won or loss, or a retirement transpires. All of these daily situations can create feelings of loss. Feeling grief is normal and natural. Unfortunately, it is society’s reaction to loss which can make us feel uncomfortable with the emotions we are experiencing.  In the workplace, most corporate policies provide us with a few days to deal with the trauma or death of a loved one.  Within this short time we are expected to put the pain behind us and come back to work in a functioning manner. The Grief Recovery Method® (GRM) was designed by grievers for grievers.  It is an alternative to traditional therapy and is, at its core, an educational program.  Participants identify the losses they feel are incomplete or those which have been left unfinished.  Once identified they are taught a simple, yet effective, four step process to complete these emotions in order to actually “set these memories down”. As human beings we want to finish the story we have experienced. Many times, in finishing the story, we also attempt to rewrite the ending.  Our mind enumerates over and over the “would have”, “should have”, and “could have” scenarios looking to complete [...]

Grief During the Holiday Season Are you or someone you know experiencing grief? This article is to help you understand how to help yourself heal during the holiday season, or how to support someone you know who is grieving over the holidays. First, it is important to know that the experience of grief and mourning is different for everyone. No two people will experience the same loss in the same way. For some people, the grief they experience feels unbearable. Holidays can heighten this feeling. I hope the information that is provided in this article will be a supportive aid as this holiday season approaches. There is often pressure on grieving individuals (either internally, or from others) to put aside their sadness and hurt and be full of joy and thanksgiving. However, memories of the loved one resurface during events where the loved one would have been. While this information was designed for people whose loved one has died, grief happens whenever you lose something. An individual may be feeling grief after moving to a new city and not being able to connect with friends or family, they may also feel grief after losing a pet, or after being diagnosed with a critical illness, and this list can go on. Therefore, if you feel like you are grieving something other than a loved one, the information in this article can still be helpful. What does grief look like? Common initial feelings of grief: Shock, denial, disbelief, numbness Common feelings and experiences: Anger, guilt, regret, blame, sadness, depression, panic, fear, worry, relief, confusion, doubt, questioning one’s faith, changes in sleep. This list does not cover all the emotions and experiences one may have when grieving. Thinking that you do not want to go one with life is normal, but thinking about suicide is not. If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, seek help immediately by going to your hospital’s emergency room, or talk to a therapist, doctor, or crisis support line. St. Leonard’s 24 Hour Mental Health Crisis Line: 519-759-7188 or toll free: 1-866-811-7188 Are you grieving? Here are some reminders during this upcoming holiday. Love does not end with death. Our society wants you to join in the holiday spirit, but it may not feel that easy for you. Remember to be compassionate with yourself as you heal. Do what is right for you during the holidays. As you become aware of your needs, share them with trusted people. Talk about your grief and about the person who has died. Your pain will not go away by avoiding talking about your feelings and memories. Find supportive and comforting family or friends who will listen to you without judgment. If you include the person’s name in conversation, others are more likely to recognize your need to remember them as an important part of your life. If faith or spirituality is an important part of your life, find people who are respectful of your need to talk about this part of your [...]

I debated writing this article for a while, the title alone probably tells you why. We feel so much guilt as parents, whether we should or not is another topic, but the fact of the matter is some of us go over every decision we have made in our child’s life and agonize over what we could have done better. Earlier this month I found myself sitting in the waiting room of a mental health clinic, and not as the owner this time, but as the mother of a child who desperately needed help. A big part of my job is to educate people about mental health and to advocate for those with mental health disorders, and their families. I tell people that they shouldn’t feel bad for what is going on, and that it isn’t any one’s fault. But there I was, my heart racing, palms sweating and feeling like I had let my child down again. Should I have noticed sooner that things weren’t right? Did I ignore big red flags because of meetings and laundry and my other kids and packing lunches? Am I that wrapped up in everything that needs to be done that I’m not seeing what is going on right in front of me? That negative little voice inside was working double time during that counselling session, telling me everything I didn’t do right, going back years and picking over every mistake. Why do we do that to ourselves? When asking myself if I am the best mother, the obvious and truthful answer is no. None of us are. But I know these things for a fact: 1. I love my kids more than I could ever really put into words, 2. I work hard to provide them with what they need, 3. I am proactive about their health and try to make sure they are getting everything they need, 4. I listen when they tell me they have a problem. 5. I enjoy my time with them and am always looking to have quality time with each of them. If there are other parents out there reading this, and they are noticing things about their child’s mood or behaviour, the prevailing feeling is probably fear (it was for me.) No one wants to acknowledge or accept that something might be wrong with their child. The second feeling is that worry that you did something wrong. My daughter didn’t have the ideal childhood. I was 19 when I found out I was pregnant with her, and her father and I had only met a few short months earlier. I’m not ashamed to share this anymore because it is a part of my story, and I have never for one moment regretted the birth of my first child. Needless to say, the relationship was not healthy, loving or stable and I spent 4 years trapped in a cycle of power and control, which unfortunately, my daughter witnessed. Becoming a single mother, obviously had its [...]

How do I make an appointment? You can email us or call us at 519-302-2300 to speak to a receptionist. The receptionist will ask you general information questions regarding the support you are looking for. This will help them pair you with a counsellor/therapist who is trained to work with the issues you would like support with. They will then book you with an appointment that works for you. You can also request a free 15 minute face-to-face consult with your counsellor/therapist first. What can I expect during my first visit? Reaching out for help is not always easy and we want to make the process as simple as possible. When you arrive, our receptionist will greet you and have you fill out a form with basic information and sign a confidentiality agreement. You will then pay. Your therapist will bring you into their office and you will get to know each other. The therapist will go over the confidentiality and privacy agreement. You can ask your therapist any questions you have. You will create a goal(s) to work on. At the end, your therapist will bring you to reception to book another appointment. How much will it cost? Our fees range from $100-140, per session depending on which service you need. Each client is given a customized treatment plan so the total cost depends on each individuals needs. If you have extended health care benefits, reach out to your provider to find out how much they cover and what type of professionals they cover. Unfortunately, our services are not covered by OHIP. Can anyone call and ask if I am attending therapy? No, unless you have provided written permission, we cannot confirm or deny that you are a client at Brant Mental Health Solutions. Your privacy is importance to us. What happens if my therapist is not a good fit? Although we try to fit you with a therapist who is best suited to work with the issues you are seeking therapy for, sometimes there are reasons you and your therapist do not connect. If this happens, you can call us and we will see which therapist may be a better fit. What forms of payments do you take? Fees are paid before each session at the reception desk. We accept cash, debit, Mastercard and Visa. WHAT IF I HAVE TO CANCEL AN APPOINTMENT? If you need to cancel an appointment, please call 519-302-2300 to speak with a receptionist. The receptionist can also reschedule a new appointment for you at that time. To avoid paying a session fee for a cancelled appointment, please provide 24 hours prior notice.

Chronic pain is a challenge that more and more people are facing every day.  From headaches and migraines to back and joint pain, experiences of chronic pain can seriously disrupt your quality of life. Adding psychotherapy treatment to the more traditional approaches to pain may provide you with a powerful tool for addressing chronic pain. How does that work? The more technology advances, the more we are able to study the brain, and we are starting to understand how the brain functions in relation to pain.  The latest research shows that pain originates in the brain.  But, it’s not a mater of pain being “all in your head”.  All pain is real, and each experience of pain is personal and unique.  The brain is simply responding to danger signals that it is picking up from all around you. Providing Protection The mind has an incredible capacity to protect us from what it considers to be dangerous situations or emotional reactions that may generate a fear response.  In certain situations, the brain may generate pain as a distraction to keep us safe from experiences that the mind determines to be too painful to bear.  Consider a child who has a fallen in the playground.  There is moment where the child is not sure whether to cry or not, and their reaction is dependant upon on the reaction of caregivers around them.  If there appears to be no danger, then there is no need for a pain response. What can I do to help my mind release pain? Strong emotions such as anger, grief and guilt may be one of the causes of ongoing, chronic pain.  Learning to identify and experience strong emotions without suppressing them, may result in a reduction of pain.  A simple practice is to try paying extra attention to what is happening in your life.  Consider what your worries and stressors are, and reflect on how you feel about them.  If the feelings are overwhelming or you feel stuck, then seek the help of a qualified psychotherapist who can assist you in this process.